Friday, June 30, 2006

Sharon's dishes

They appear to wash themselves. If only.


Thursday, June 29, 2006

Sharon speeds

And is aerodynamic with a great smile.


Wednesday, June 28, 2006

Sharon's makeup

When Sharon's all made up she likes to smear her face across the back window of her brothers car and then run down the street asking strangers for spare change. Disturbing, but she banks everytime.


Tuesday, June 27, 2006

Sharon dispenser

Open wide and say, "SHAZ"


Monday, June 26, 2006

Sharon's catch and release

Sharon sees herself as more of a plucker than a hunter.
Here she humanely acquires bear fur to cover her wedgies.
Her actions often draw protest.


Saturday, June 24, 2006

The Spotbottom family

Sharon's Family

Sharon's Dadoo:
Baron Von Spotbottom is a lovely man who enjoys his pets and tinkering around the house.

Sharon's Mamoo:
Clodagh Spotbottom is prone to chasing Sharon with a broom. Sharon has her fathers nose.

Sharon's sister:
Grindle once led a bus load of Girl Scouts over a cliff and then went home to eat all their cookies with Sharon.

Sharon's brother:
Ted Spotbottom hums and smiles when he reads.

Friday, June 23, 2006

Thursday, June 22, 2006

Spotbottom hounds

The Spotbottom floofin-hounds bred only on the shire.


Wednesday, June 21, 2006

Sharon in a window

Sharon has been still for days. She occasionally inspires a second glance from a passerby but that's only when she has an itch.


Tuesday, June 20, 2006

Sharon Air

Welcome to the Sharony skies where Sharon graces the air with her tartan undercarriage and beret-inforced vertical stabilizer. Looks good from above or below.


Monday, June 19, 2006

Sharon clown

Sharon is a major sub-type of the oldest and most well-known of clowns, the Whiteface. She wears make up not to hide her features, but rather to reveal them. The impact is both magical and jarring.


Friday, June 16, 2006

Sharon out

Plastered, smashed, bombed, sloshed, sauced, blitzed, pissed, tanked, loaded, trashed, hammered, pie-eyed, blotto, ripped, stewed, pickled, snozzled, three sheets to the wind.


Thursday, June 15, 2006

Sharon's flat screen

Sharon's built for the flat screen where it doesn't matter if
the camera adds ten pounds.


Wednesday, June 14, 2006

Sharon annoying

Grindle's in her room and she won't come out.
Flick, ping, ow...SHARON, quit it!


Tuesday, June 13, 2006

Sharon's airbag

It poofs out to cushion Sharon when she's asleep at the wheel.


Monday, June 12, 2006

Sharon slinky

Slinky:(adj) Graceful, sinuous, and sleek.
Slink: (n) An animal, especially a calf, born prematurely.
Slunk: (v) To move in a quiet furtive manner; sneak.
Sounds like Sharon.


Friday, June 09, 2006

Enchanted Sharon

Oh the languid vapors of beauty and abundance in summer.


Thursday, June 08, 2006

Spotbottom holdings

Hotels, Towers, and Tenements.


Wednesday, June 07, 2006

Sharon's tightrope

They fell 200ft to the net below. Sharon regrets not eating the extra peanuts on the way down. They lodged in her tartan upon impact.


Tuesday, June 06, 2006

Sharon's rickets

Oh yeah, that's right it's 6/6/06 and Sharon woke up with the rickets.
Sign of the beast or cry for a tall glass of milk in the sunshine?
Get thee to some phosphates.


Monday, June 05, 2006

Sharon's Mandala

Impermanence never looked so good.


Friday, June 02, 2006

Thursday, June 01, 2006

Sharon's poo

When neck deep in other people's poop Sharon never forgets to plant
flowers and breath in the fragrant scent of hope.