Sharon's dishes

They appear to wash themselves. If only.

Sharon speeds

And is aerodynamic with a great smile.

Sharon's makeup

When Sharon's all made up she likes to smear her face across the back window of her brothers car and then run down the street asking strangers for spare change. Disturbing, but she banks everytime.

Sharon dispenser

Open wide and say, "SHAZ"

Sharon's catch and release

Sharon sees herself as more of a plucker than a hunter.
Here she humanely acquires bear fur to cover her wedgies.
Her actions often draw protest.

The Spotbottom family

Sharon's Dadoo:
Baron Von Spotbottom is a lovely man who enjoys his pets and tinkering around the house.

Sharon's Mamoo:
Clodagh Spotbottom is prone to chasing Sharon with a broom. Sharon has her fathers nose.

Sharon's sister:
Grindle once led a bus load of Girl Scouts over a cliff and then went home to eat all their cookies with Sharon.

Sharon's brother:
Ted Spotbottom hums and smiles when he reads.

Red Sharon

Spotbottom hounds

The Spotbottom floofin-hounds bred only on the shire.

Sharon in a window

Sharon has been still for days. She occasionally inspires a second glance from a passerby but that's only when she has an itch.

Sharon Air

Welcome to the Sharony skies where Sharon graces the air with her tartan undercarriage and beret-inforced vertical stabilizer. Looks good from above or below.

Sharon clown

Sharon is a major sub-type of the oldest and most well-known of clowns, the Whiteface. She wears make up not to hide her features, but rather to reveal them. The impact is both magical and jarring.

Sharon out

Plastered, smashed, bombed, sloshed, sauced, blitzed, pissed, tanked, loaded, trashed, hammered, pie-eyed, blotto, ripped, stewed, pickled, snozzled, three sheets to the wind.

Sharon's flat screen

Sharon's built for the flat screen where it doesn't matter if
the camera adds ten pounds.

Sharon annoying

Grindle's in her room and she won't come out.
Flick, ping, ow...SHARON, quit it!

Sharon's airbag

It poofs out to cushion Sharon when she's asleep at the wheel.

Sharon slinky

Slinky:(adj) Graceful, sinuous, and sleek.
Slink: (n) An animal, especially a calf, born prematurely.
Slunk: (v) To move in a quiet furtive manner; sneak.
Sounds like Sharon.

Enchanted Sharon

Oh the languid vapors of beauty and abundance in summer.

Spotbottom holdings

Hotels, Towers, and Tenements.

Sharon's tightrope

They fell 200ft to the net below. Sharon regrets not eating the extra peanuts on the way down. They lodged in her tartan upon impact.

Sharon's rickets

Oh yeah, that's right it's 6/6/06 and Sharon woke up with the rickets.
Sign of the beast or cry for a tall glass of milk in the sunshine?
Get thee to some phosphates.

Sharon's Mandala

Impermanence never looked so good.

Sharon's molars

Ewww.

Sharon's poo

When neck deep in other people's poop Sharon never forgets to plant
flowers and breath in the fragrant scent of hope.